More Conservative News
eJewishPhilanthropy has focused on one aspect of interfaith family inclusion, that relating to the Conservative movement, this month. Adam Pollack and Sophie Mortman of 18Doors had an oped, “Conservative rabbis are already engaging interfaith families, with or without the movement.” They report that many Conservative rabbis want to be inclusive of interfaith families and that 18Doors is helping them to do so, which is very good. But in my opinion, these efforts collide with the movement’s current understandings of halakhah which lead to policies that exclude partners from different faith backgrounds from Jewish engagement (and, since partners tend to stick together, the Jewish partners too).
As one parent who is not Jewish said in the recent Parenting When Jewish and Something Else study, referring to a nearby Conservative synagogue: “It would be great for our son to do his bar mitzvah there and I could participate. But I know that Conservative synagogues have a lot of restrictions and traditions I’m excluded from. I don’t want my children feeling like I’m excluded.”
Later in the month Rabbi Steven Wernick, former CEO of the United Synagogue, wrote “Here’s what renewal looks like in the Conservative movement.” Rabbi Wernick is an excellent congregational rabbi leading a thriving Conservative synagogue. He says they cultivate belonging primarily by offering free membership to those under 40 and building relationships during the early years – an excellent strategy. He says they embrace interfaith families with warmth and respect with non-judgmental invitations – also excellent.
But in my opinion, he goes way too far calling that approach “radical welcoming.” My question is, do the interfaith families in the congregation feel belonging, and choose community there, when confronted with the boundary that the clergy won’t officiate at weddings of interfaith couples – and all that implies about status issues and other restrictions on ritual participation by partners from different faith backgrounds? And how many interfaith families don’t come in the door because of those restrictions?
Rabbi Wernick says the boundary is vital to halakhic integrity. As I wrote in my response to Rabbi Brusso’s Sources essay last month, which took a similar position, if the movement cannot evolve halakhah, as it has in the case of women, and gay and lesbian Jews, in ways that validate interfaith marriage and permit officiation, more and more people are going to say, “I’m not a Conservative Jew.”
(eJP had another piece, “Conservative Judaism’s Procedural Paralysis,” which didn’t focus on interfaith families.)
News from 18Doors and…
18Doors and Honeymoon Israel announced Rabbi Shena Potter Jaffee as Director of Rabbinic Talent Development. The organizations share a “deep commitment to giving rabbis and Jewish educators the tools, training, and support they need to engage young multi-heritage couples and families in meaningful, inclusive ways.” Rabbi Jaffee will lead 18Doors’ Rukin Rabbinic Fellowship, and oversee the recruitment and training of rabbis and educators across North America who lead immersive travel experiences for young couples through both Honeymoon Israel and Togethering, which are coming together.
News from PJ Library
Jessica McCormick, director of family experience at PJ Library, writes in eJP that “PJ Library has the highest impact on families who need accessible, parent-led Jewish engagement the most. 42% of households we reach aren’t affiliated with a synagogue, and less engaged families and multifaith families score higher than average on every measure we track. In other words, PJ Library books and programming help those families even more with everything from increased knowledge of Jewish traditions to greater confidence in engaging their children with Jewish values.” Their Get Together microgrant initiative helps families host gatherings, “encouraging them to be the builders of their own Jewish community, which is itself a core Jewish value. Because when families get together, belonging takes shape. And that sense of belonging? It’s exactly what will help keep Jewish life vibrant for the next generation.”
Looking Back at “Jew vs. Jew”
Andy Silow-Carroll, a terrific journalist, interviewed Sam Freedman on the 25th anniversary of his book “Jew vs. Jew.” One comment caught my eye: “If the Jewish vote becomes more conservative or more Republican, two statistics will tell you why: the birth rate and the rate of interfaith marriage.” I can understand that the Orthodox have a high birth rate, and tend to be conservative and Republican. But I was afraid that the comment meant that interfaith families, or the children of interfaith families, aren’t Jewish, which would also result in a higher percentage of Jewish voters being conservative and Orthodox.
So I contacted Sam and am very glad to report that that is not his view. He says that interfaith families tend to be Democrats, and he is concerned that if pollsters stop counting many adult children of interfaith families as Jewish voters, then the share of Jewish votes for Democrats will appear to be dropping. But he didn’t mean to suggest that he thinks they shouldn’t be counted as Jewish voters.
Data
eJP reported on a CASJE webinar I attended, “Signals of a Surge: What does Jewish engagement look like post-October 7th?” where panelists from the JFNA, Hillel, UJAFed-NY, URJ and Prizmah described their research. eJP also reported on the JFNA’s recently-released breakdown of a survey released this spring that showed that “the impact of ‘the Surge’ is waning more quickly among Jews from minority populations, including LGBTQ Jews, Jews of color, Jews with disabilities and financially vulnerable Jews, than it is among the broader Jewish community.”
Mimi Kravetz, JFNA’s chief impact and growth officer, said, “We’re sad and disheartened to see that these marginalized groups are engaging so much less than they were at this time last year…. It’s still higher than baseline. There’s still people showing up more. But there has been a more significant drop among these most marginalized groups.” She also said that what affects the sense of engagement and belonging of Jews of Color is that “they need to see a reflection of themselves in leaders and other participants. They need space to show up as their whole self, whatever that looks like for them. They need to see visible evidence of diversity and inclusion policies and practice, and that those policies will be followed, and they need to know before they enter.” I’d say the same is true of interfaith couples and families.
Although none of the panelists at the webinar offered any data on either surging or declining engagement by interfaith families, David Manchester said JFNA was currently working on an analysis of that data. He also aptly said, as quoted by eJP, “The hardest thing to walk into a Jewish program is the concern about not knowing people. … What I’ve over the last few years been saying to people is [that it] doesn’t matter what the topic of the program is, it is a relationship-building program, and that needs to be our top goal if we want to keep these people engaging in the Jewish community.”
Jimena: Jews Indigenous To The Middle East and North Africa released a fascinating study, “Sephardic & Mizrahi Jews in the United States: Identities, Experience, and Communities.” Sephardic Jews are estimated to be 10% of American Jews, and they have lower intermarriage rates – the study says 25% compared to Ashkenazi Jews’ 36% (based on data in seven communities studied by the Cohen Center, plus New York, p. 66). The goal of the study is to create a more inclusive Jewish environment for Sephardic and Mizrahi Jews.
The study includes portraits of four communities. I learned about a Syrian Jewish community’s Takkana edict from 1936 which forbids not only intermarriage, but also marriage to converts (p. 85); that interviewees from a Persian community gave “mixed reports” with some saying interfaith marriage is “definitely not common” and others describing it as “a former taboo that is now being challenged” (p. 102); and that in a Miami community, “There are strong mores against intermarriage between Jews and non-Jews – but Sephardic and Ashkenazi couplings are generally accepted.” (p. 128)
Jewtina y Co. released “Latin-Jewish Los Angeles,” a reanalysis of the federation’s 2021 Study of Jewish LA. It found that 94% of children in Latino/a Jewish households are being raised J; 19% of respondents have intermarried parents; 33% of married respondents are intermarried. (p. 8) The study includes a page on navigating interfaith relationships (p. 18) and recommendations for inclusive programming, mentioning 18Doors and Base LA. (p. 21)
In Other News:
- An interesting podcast discussion between Yehuda Kurtzer and Christine Hayes, “Non-Jewish in the Shadow of the Synagogue.”
- Chabad announced a “New Global Matchmaking Database to Combat Intermarriage.”
- The Cleveland Jewish News had a nice article, “Experts help interfaith families connect during High Holy Day services,” featuring among others Rabbi Melinda Mersack and Rabbi Miriam Wajnberg.
- The Jewish Chronicle reports on a summit for young Jewish professionals held by the UK’s Jewish Leadership Council that explored ways to avoid declining Jewish engagement post-college. Unfortunately the concern seemed to be all about marrying out and not about welcoming interfaith couples in. One participant said “There’s a lot of marrying out going on in the Jewish community. Maybe that’s due to a lack of suitable events taking place for young people…. People marrying out is a concern for me as I want to have a strong Jewish community around me. The more people who marry out, the less of a community there will be.”
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